If You Want To Be Successful Learn To Wipe Your Own Arse!

Okay, firstly apologies for that rather crude title but it really does sum up what I want to say in this post.

Remember when you were a small child and your parents did everything for you?

Bathed you

Cooked your meals and fed you

Dressed you

Attended to your every whim

And literally wiped your botty

Well there comes a time in life when eventually you have to learn to do all these things for yourself, it’s part of growing up and learning to become independent so that you can survive in the real world.

You can also see examples of this in the animal kingdom and I always remember a particular wildlife documentary about tiger cubs where the mother provided everything for the cubs for the first few weeks but then after the initial period of providing food and showing them the ropes, the cubs were left to fend for themselves ….and they managed it quite well to be honest.

Humans on the other hand often have great difficulty in letting go and cutting those apron strings. They can really struggle with the concept of independent thought, thinking for themselves and using their own brains to solve problems.

I’ve seen examples of this all through my working life, I’m even guilty of this myself…after all it’s much easier to just ask someone to solve a problem for you than try to sort it out yourself isn’t it.

But the problem is that it doesn’t teach you how to become independent and self reliant and these qualities should be encouraged as much as possible.

I will always be eternally grateful to my girlfriend Amanda for the way she taught me to find my own solutions to problems.

Amanda and I worked together a couple of years ago for a local newspaper, she was in a management role and I was under her supervision. Obviously due to the fact that we were also romantically involved made for quite a complicated working relationship and presented various challenges for us.

However, it also gave me a great insight into the daily problems she faced as a manager.

Quite often in the workplace there is an ‘us and them’ mentality expressed by the workforce but my experience helped me to see that the management are simply people trying to do a job.

As it happens, Amanda was a very popular supervisor due to the fact that she was always approachable and went that extra mile to help people out. Unfortunately this also became the bane of her working life because people came to depend on her and lean on her a little too much.

So I took it upon myself to try and help the situation and became a sort of fountain of knowledge among my co-workers, helping them out as much as I could.

Obviously I was motivated to do this because I saw how they were treating the woman I loved and I wanted to help the situation if I could.

Before you knew it I very quickly became the person that people went to if they had a problem, quite often I was staggered by the sheer laziness of some of my co-workers who had access to the exact same resources that I had yet couldn’t be bothered to figure out things for themselves.

Conversely, there were others among my workmates who just got on with things and found their own solutions and these were the people I admired. You could give them the initial information and instructions of how to get the job done and any other difficulties that arose they would solve themselves…and only ask for help as a last resort.

I love people like this, they are the winners, the ones who never give up and will always try to seek out a positive solution.

It’s the same with internet marketing.

Obviously in my role as a VA handling several different support desks I come across all types of attitudes and mentalities.

There are those who will just run with the information given and try to solve their own problems by thinking outside the box and seeking further knowledge from other resources.

Then there are the ones who need constant hand holding at every step of the way and throw their hands up in despair when things don’t work out for them straight away. These people will never be successful and just give up far too easily.

Don’t get me wrong, I know how hard it is to make it online.

To start with you have to find your way through the shark infested waters avoiding all the scam artists and con men out there just trying to part you from your hard earned cash.

Then when you DO find someone genuine who tells it how it really is, you realise that you have to work at this stuff, it’s NOT going to happen overnight and you will face stumbling blocks.

Finding something that really works though is half the battle and this is one of the main reasons why I started this blog – to show you what can work online.

So that’s my part of the bargain, I can promise you if you become a regular subscriber of mine I WILL show you what works and I’ll help you avoid all the bullshitters online.

Then it’s up to YOU to fulfill YOUR side of the bargain and be determined to make it work for you.

Basically, I’ll teach you how to wipe your own botty (metaphorically speaking of course) …..then you have to do it yourself 🙂


  • Frank Ayres

    Reply Reply March 8, 2012

    A great post, i must admit i was interested to see what you had to say after reading the subject.

    Some great info and i totally agree with the statement that we need to learn to do things ourselves instead of waiting for others to do them for us

  • Robert Chenery

    Reply Reply March 10, 2012

    Hi Edward,

    Re: your post “If You Want to Be Successful Learn to Wipe Your Own Arse!” I take what you are saying here and totally agree with a lot of what you put across.

    There is also a fine line here I think especially in the business of Internet Marketing. It is great to know how things work for example uploading a website with FTP, some basic HTML or writing sales copy etc.

    Once you know and understand all this stuff you don’t always want to be doing it all yourself as this can take up a lot of your own time.

    This is where outsourcing comes into play. As you will know a lot of successful marketers outsource some of their work that perhaps is essential but a bit monotonous and this frees up their time to work on other areas of their business.

    Also sometimes when you hit a problem or situation two heads can be better than one as another persons input can get you looking at the issue from a totally different perspective.

    Successful people don’t always try to do it all themselves they also leverage other peoples time and money.

    If you read Napoleon Hills Think & Grow Rich book it mentions about a Master Mind group. This is a group of like minded people who can help you to problem solve and come up with new ideas.

    If you think about it Internet forums are a bit like this a collection of like minded people communicating and helping each other all in one place.

    What I am trying to say here is yes learn to problem solve and make your own decisions but asking for someone else’s view could throw some new light on the subject or send you off in a totally different direction.


    Robert Chenery

    • Edward Rush

      Reply Reply March 13, 2012

      Hi Robert

      Thanks for your comment 🙂

      I agree that it’s good to get a 2nd opinion on stuff you’re not sure about.

      This post mainly refers to the type of people who tend to use support as a crutch and don’t try and think for themselves when faced with a problem.

      Personally, I will always try to find my own solutions before I contact anyone else and many people seem to forget that there is now a full range of resources at their fingertips that can help with problem solving such as…


      It’s a great habit to get into to try and find one’s own solutions as it exercises the brain and improves problem solving skills.

      Just my view.

  • Yvonne Horton

    Reply Reply March 16, 2012

    Glad to see someone else has read Napoleon Hill. I agree that we should try to resolve our own problems but also take note that in Think and Grow Rich Napoleon Hill wrote that Henry Ford when accused of being an uneducated man answered that on his desk he had buttons that he pressed and that when he pressed any of them someone who knew the answers would appear. Today more than ever we have access to someone who can help us solve our problems easier.

    Learn the difference between being smart and being wise and you will have more knowledge than many who believe that they are highly educated. – napoleon Hill

  • Malcolm Charlaw

    Reply Reply March 22, 2012

    This is a great post, makes you think a bit about standing on your own two legs.

    It is a good thing to learn how to do things on your own, but, as you point out, a balance needs to be found.

    Having been an IT contractor, it has often been the case of hitting the ground running and learning fast. So many systems that are unique to each company that I’ve worked for. After an initial training, it’s get on with it.

    I enjoy that environment!!

    Thanks again for a great post!!


    Malcolm Charlaw

  • Gareth Kentish

    Reply Reply April 12, 2012

    Hi Edward,
    The ‘language’ thing has to be a Northern idiosyncrasy? Effective nevertheless. Your blog has stacks of excellent information that complements my online business, so I will certainly explore with interest.
    May be capture why Amanda was regarded as such a good manager? So many poor ‘chiefs’ out there. This knowledge could be ‘bottled’ or possibly an eBook?
    Thanks Edward,
    Kind regards

  • Trevor Lundstrom

    Reply Reply December 29, 2012

    Hello Edward,
    Great post, simple subject and very well delivered.
    Thank you for the wake-up call.

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